Farm Fresh Fairy Tales
No, no, sweetie,
don’t you cry
That little piggie
wanted to die
Bacon is so good
and yummy
Don’t you want more
in your tummy?
Eating meat
makes you strong and big,
don’t cry over
a dirty pig
She gives us milk,
that sweet, old cow
Her baby doesn’t
need it now
Her udders are
so big and full
She’s thankful when
we start to pull
Old MacDonald’s Farm
has only happy cows
They smile and laugh all day,
singing to the sows
When the butcher comes,
they hope it is their turn
Being on your plate,
an honor for which they yearn
There was no pain
It didn’t suffer
We needed it
to be our supper
Chicken meat
is so humane,
especially with
that tiny brain
Eat a nugget,
get a toy
A happy meal
for a girl or boy
Beef! It’s what’s for dinner
We need protein, you know
And make sure you’ve “got milk,”
it helps a body grow
Eating lots of meat:
the only way to grow
E-I-E-I-Oh no
That simply isn’t so
Eggplant, beans, and broccoli,
lentils, flax seed too
Apricots and strawberries,
they are so good for you
Everything you need
grows up from the ground
Your stomach doesn't have to be
another burial ground
Pigs are social creatures,
loving of their young
They like to play and use the mud
to protect them from the sun
With an oink oink here
and an oink oink there
The boiling vats of water
will help remove their hair
Chickens are inquisitive
and very, very bright,
warming up their babies
in their eggs at night
With a cluck cluck here
and a cluck cluck there
A male inside a hatchery
doesn’t have a prayer
Cattle are so
sweet and kind
A more peaceful creature
is hard to find
With a moo moo here
and a moo moo there
Watch them bleed and thrash around
while hanging in the air
We call them its
to qualify the degree
of the mercy they’d deserve
when called she or he
We don’t need to eat them
That story isn’t so
We can live and let live
E-I-E-I-O
Written in 2015, after reading a thread from parents giving each other advice on how to get their kids to keep eating meat, after they first discover what meat is. Illustrated by Keith Allison.